Dream

I woke up with a headache today. Not sure if it's because of the way I was sleeping: on my back, with my head on two pillows, creating a bend in my neck? Plus I'm sure it doesn't help when the air mattress loses air and I sink closer to the floor. My dreams have been vivid lately, but the subject matter is odd. Last night was the 2nd time I dreamed of being in a new house. This house had a huge first floor (actually I don't remember there being a 2nd floor), seemed like 3k square feet, in a southwestern open layout. It was the holidays and we were decorating. We had friends over, I didn't recognize them. I could sense Joanne's presence, but I never see her, same as in other dreams. I see people talking to her, and I hear her talking to them, but I never see her. The decorations are unlike any I've ever seen, yet we are happy that our new house is big enough to hold all of them, as if we've had them for a long time but were unable to bring them all out until now. Last week I dreamt of another housewarming event we had, at another place that was not this house, and I remember a face. She had thin dark straight hair, to just under her chin. Her face was plain but bright, her eyes were brown but big. It seemed as if I knew her well, yet I don't recognize her from anyone I remember in real life. Is she someone I've met, or have yet to meet? Another odd thing in these dreams is that I seem younger than I am now, like 20 years younger. Usually my vivid dreams (or parts of them) come to life many months later, but I'm confused as to how this will happen if I'm younger in my dreams. I don't know if the dream gods will be upset with me publishing these things and I'll be banished from dreaming anything memorable again. I also believe that my ship blanket must not be upside down, that the masts must point North like my head. My dreams don't last very long, not sure why. Maybe it's because I wake up every hour to re inflate the mattress. I wish I could find that slow leak. I would love to sleep uninterrupted for more than an hour. It seems like all I want to do is worry less and sleep more. I like my work duties, they keep my mind busy. I don't like my home life, and now that both girls are living here and neither are currently working, I no longer have time or space to myself other than in my room, away from the rest of them. They do the same in their own rooms, so it all works out, but the house is no longer all mine. Bills are piling up, calls are more frequent. I see a light at the end of the tunnel, I believe this will all end soon, one way or another. Time to go and find out...

What, indeed

I used to work with a guy whose favorite saying was “What does it all mean?”, and I remember how it would both crack me up and make me wonder it myself, for various reasons. This was a smart guy, smarter than most, and he was a manager of a full service coffee shop-type restaurant. I was one of his assistant managers, and he was highly regarded (at the time) by upper management, so I was very fortunate (career-wise) to be a part of his team. Of course I knew that this was not going to be the life for me, and I was equally surprised as to why he was here when he could be doing just about anything in an engineering or science field. Our jobs were not very glamorous nor financially rewarding for the amount of hours and labor that we put in to it, but it was work at a time when things were not economically as strong as they are today, and in an industry that would never lack for customers -- plus there was always free food if you wanted it (Survival -- first order of business!). That saying of his has stuck with me to this day. What does it all mean? We live, we work, we sustain, we provide, we survive, we die. Don't worry, this will not be one of those philosophical rants. Not yet. It just occurred to me as I woke up today but stayed in bed (it was warm and cozy) while I ran through my thoughts...about the new job, about my financial woes, about my family, about things that I need or want to do around the house, about people and how they act/react to things, about the current political and economic climate, and so on. I see the tv in the distance. It's after 6am, which means Morning Joe is on. But I find that I'm not as easily swayed in jumping up to turn it on as I used to be. Things have changed. They always do, I know that. Robert Frost was so right when he wrote "nothing gold can stay." It's not profound on the surface, but it sure hits the spot when you think about it. Your favorite thing can never stay the way it is. And why does that always have to be? This tv show was off the radar for so many years, but it was the like the best-kept secret among talk shows, which allowed it to be bold, creative, and thought-provoking. But as the word got out, it began to evolve, as if to placate the new fans as well as the long-time viewers. Which led to the romance with ratings, which leads to addiction to get more, which steers you away from what made you so great in the first place. It happens to everything. "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" is a recent example. When it first aired, it was on once a week, hosted by Regis Philbin, and it was compelling, especially to us trivia geeks. Then it changed, when the buzz was out and people cried for more. It aired "special" episodes outside of its normal viewing time, and they would tweak the rules, and the audience and contestants would also evolve. Then they changed the host, and tweaked the show even more, aired it more times during the week, adding more confusion to the lives of those who enjoyed it as a welcome escape but could no longer keep up with the changes -- and then, it hit a saturation point and viewers moved on. The show itself moved to syndication, which translated into more money for the producers, but by now it had lost its edge with those that enjoyed it for what it once was. {sidenote: we now have daily HQ Trivia, and I find myself looking for tell-tale signs of evolvement, as I know it will, too, change for the worse sooner or later, until it burns out} What does it all mean? We stop here, as the day begins and the new job calls, but we will come back to expand on this -- and hopefully not after another 3-yr break...

Return to Melancholy

Welcome back. Where have we been? What have we missed? Why does it matter? There is a time in history that is generally known as The Era Of Good Feeling. I don't recall the nature of the Era and specifically why it was tagged as such, but the moniker always stuck with me. I would often wonder what it would be like to experience an Era of Good Feeling. Given humanity's basic instinct to perpetually self destruct, I find it interesting that there would actually be a time and or place that could hold back the perpetual negativity of human advancement. I woke up this morning feeling very low, yet (as always) very aware of perspective. I don't see myself as one to wallow in misery. It does not compute, and I would prefer to do anything to snap out of it quickly, as depression seems to be a waste of energy. And yet here I was, facing the reality of another day, another challenge of meeting expectations. Is that what life is really all about? A daily affirmation of the challenge to meet expectations, for you, for your immediate family, for those who want or have to depend on you? I often wonder how others in human history have come face to face with this mental anquish, and wonder how they handled it. I am certain this dark mental cloud has overwhelmed many, from ancient greek philosophers, to roman soldiers, to egyptian servants, to feudal serfs, to asian merchants, to african elders, to colonists, to ship mates circumnavigating the world, to mid level industrialists, to spouses of power hungry men...the list is not unique, there have been millions just like me, who reach a certain plain of mental awareness because they seek it, only to be disappointed when they get there because they realize it's not the right place to be and we need to climb higher.

“I do believe that an AK-47, a machine gun, is not a sporting weapon or needed for defense of a home.” -Ronald Reagan, at his 78th birthday

— Small Penis Gun Club (@SmPenisGunClub) August 21, 2013

Goodnight! pic.twitter.com/zM995uHPBl

— Fascinating Pictures (@Fascinatingpics) August 16, 2013

Vroom! Maserati for the middle class? @Streetsignscnbc @SullyCNBC https://t.co/9BviOloRiE

— Amanda Drury (@MandyCNBC) August 12, 2013

Doing the math on what Fed tapering will mean for investors: http://t.co/6yMRk9EIq2

— MarketWatch (@MarketWatch) August 16, 2013

test1a2b3c

The Professor is absolutely correct on the Iggles gimmick offense being exposed as beatable when the regular season starts. #calledit

— Phillip Aldrete (@phillipa_nc) August 16, 2013

Welcome Back, Mitt

There's an old saying that "Politics makes strange bedfellows" (apologies to the bard). The upcoming Michigan primary is setting itself up as a prime example of this saying in the sense that the Prodigal Son, Mitt Romney, is finding himself in a virtual dead heat with the Tea Party favorite son Rick (I never met a gay person I didn't hate) Santorum. If Mr. Romney is asking himself, "how in the world is this happening?", I'll be glad to offer my help. In my humble opinion, Mitt seems to be almost too aloof to the seriousness in front of him, starting with the way he dresses to town hall events. Here's a tip, Mitt: in times of trouble, most people are "resolute" and rise to the challenge, but at the same time, most would appreciate a hand-up by a mentor that is there to support them all the way back. Mitt, you have to present yourself as that mentor -- you certainly have the qualifications, but you give the appearance that you are trying too hard to drop yourself down a few levels to as to "relate" to those you are trying to win over, and I have to ask "why"? Here's a couple of ideas you need to implement now if you want to turn the tide: (1) Stop with the patronizing and stop with the clumsy attempts to dumb down your speeches! I'm not suggesting you talk in Harvard professor levels, but you don't have to do the silly "I love lakes...I love the trees here...I love cars!" rube. Just be yourself. Voters want to see a leader that cares but also a leader that shows he's not afraid of the obstacles in front of him and won't be distracted by the height of trees. (2) Stop wearing jeans to a town hall event. Wear a suit, but with NO TIE, just a plain open-collared look. Shows you are relaxed, but also shows you mean business. We know you have a ton of money, and sure, you're allowed to enjoy a nice pair of jeans just as much as the next guy, but you're running for POTUS, not leader of the local auto union chapter. (3) Take the Michigan voters to task! Don't ask for their vote -- TELL them you deserve their vote! You were born here, your family has deep roots here, you need to press it home that you expect them to support you because of it. Openly take offense that you are lagging in the polls. Transfer the burden from you to the voters, and watch what happens...

Carl said it right:

"Here is something for you to really consider......

We all heard of the great loss to mankind with
the passing of Steve Jobs.

I honestly feel like I have lost a friend with his passing.

Here he was, 56 years old, loved by millions.....

Handsome, clever, witty, enriched countless lives....

....and had Billions of $$ in the bank,
one of the wealthiest people on earth....

Yet, you and I are infinitely wealthier than he is...

.... As WE HAVE TODAY, and sadly, he does not.

Spend your infinite wealth today on something
that matters, enrich people's lives like Steve did.

Spend your day today,
like Steve Jobs would spend it if he could.

Make today count!"